One of my daughter's biggest challenges is learning to control her emotions. She can get really upset over what appears to be minor things to anyone else. But to her? We're talking BIG DEAL! She has a variety of coping techniques she can use, but when she's having an "off" day, she has a hard time keeping her cool and can cry. Occasionally, some door-slamming might be involved as well. It really upsets me when this happens. But then I remember back to how I was when I was her age.
I distinctly remember slamming my share of doors too. In fact, I think I slammed a lot more doors than my daughter does. I also remember being quite sensitive and crying quite easily too. But I don't remember crying over the minutia that my daughter can cry over.
Nevertheless, we're trying to figure out how to work with our daughter to get her to express her anger or frustration in a different way. Today, for example, she told me about something that happened that caused her to be really upset. She handled the situation really well though. I complimented her on not crying and being flexible. She told me that she was really sad about the situation though. I stressed that feeling sad is perfectly fine. The important thing is how you handle it.
I'm hoping that my daughter learns the different techniques to deal with life's frustrations. We all know that life loves to hand us frustrating situations at every turn. Rage doesn't really help solve problems. As my daughter will add, "Rage only helps create new problems!"
Personally, I find a sense of humor comes in really handy!
What do you do to keep the rage away?
What a great post! We all have those 'rage' times but don't look at how we could best deal with them rather taking them as part of every day life. I'm a cryer but at times would love to throw things and scream!!
ReplyDeleteI confess that I still slam a door occasionally! But then, while I have never really been challenged by my emotions, I have always been tempermental!
ReplyDeleteHumor is good for me. So is writing! Does she have any interest in that? Or how about expressing herself with a drawing?
ReplyDeleteI'm sure you will help her find good channels for that angry energy. We all have it, after all. And you are a good mom for allowing her to feel okay about the feelings as long as she is expressing them appropriately!
=)
It's so tough to be young! She'll figure it out (with your help)
ReplyDeleteSometimes I cry because of a TV commercial or a song. She's not alone!!
ReplyDeletehmmm. to keep rage away, keep the idiots that cause it away...heehee...just kidding... The two key things for me are 1) sense of humor and 2) sense of perspective. Does it really matter at the end of the day? Sometimes it's hard to find either of those, but if you can, it definitely helps.
ReplyDeleteNice post! Controlling emotions is really hard, especially anger. It comes gradually with experience and wisdom.
ReplyDeleteIt's great that you have patience with her and humor is sometimes learned with time and life's lessons so hopefully she has that trait and it helps her also:-)
ReplyDeleteWhen I am furious I am furious and I can slamm doors or throw things. Why should I control myself when I am at home, at least it avoids me frustration and stomac aches. When I am amongst people and am angry I am as cold as ice and when I speak I try to hurt as much as I can, but I always stay very polite.
ReplyDeleteLOL, not to make light of the situation but I think all girls slam doors! I remember doing it, I remember my own girls doing it. Since we don't usually fight back physically, I think it is our way of letting out a swing without actually hurting anyone. Now that being said, it always upset me when my girls did it and I never really let them get away with it! Have a great week, Nan
ReplyDeleteIt's still hard to control rage. holding one's breath and counting to ten and telling yourself when you get to ten you will think about other things and let go of what ever the rage was about. I don't know...I tend to verbalize my unhappiness in general. Not specifically to anyone, I just let it fly. My daughter tells my grandson to calm down or go have a time out. He generally puts himself in time out...sometimes crying himself to sleep and wakes up a whole different boy.Good luck with that.~Ames
ReplyDeleteI try to focus on my breathing when I feel Rage coming on, I know that sounds silly but it works...
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like your daughter is experiencing a lot of personal growth with her emotions.... Kudos to her!
Great post for the letter "R"!
Thanks for linking.
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