Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Perspective

If you're visiting from the UBP, welcome!

Recently, I was asked to answer questions on my daughter's autism for Cafemom's blog. They're featuring about 20 moms' experiences with parenting a child on the spectrum in honor of Autism Awareness Month. One of the questions asked how I felt after receiving the diagnosis. I remember feeling just devastated. At the time, you think that there is no worse news than hearing that your child is autistic.

Looking back now, I realized that the diagnosis was the beginning of getting help for her! It's also like everything else in life--you get use to your new reality. When we first found out that she was allergic to tree nuts, and we'd have to carry around a couple of epi-pens, we were afraid our daughter wouldn't be able to eat anything without having a reaction! That certainly hasn't been the case! You just learn to adapt to the situation and continue to move forward.

Now that my daughter has learned better coping skills, and I've learned better ways of helping her out when she forgets these skills, life isn't as restrictive as it used to be. We don't have to plan our lives around her tantrums anymore! Looking back now at how I felt when she was first diagnosed, I almost feel really silly!

We recently learned that an extended family member, a boy who is the same age as my daughter, was diagnosed with Leukemia last week. He was having fun at an Easter egg hunt one day and getting diagnosed the next. This is truly devastating news for any parent and puts things in perspective for me. I'm not the type of person who prays, but we pray for this boy every day! His prognosis is good, thankfully!

Give your little ones a big hug and appreciate them in all their glorious imperfections!

20 comments:

  1. Thanks for sharing. My best friend little boy was just diagnosed last week with autism. I really enjoy reading your blog (and looking around at past post) so I can find a way to relate to her and help her anyway I can. Once again thanks through your experiences I am finding a way to help.

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  2. Hello Mom!

    I really like how you identified your families need to improve upon your strategy by adding new skills to the mix. Might this approach bless your little with or without a label? I have a mastermind group myself!

    Believe well!

    Adelaide Zindler
    http://wwww.HomeOfficeMommy.com

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  3. lukiema is awful. poor guy.

    I felt scared to get a diagnosis and postponed it for awhile then it seemed to come at the right time and I was ready for it. I was glad i had answers. My son wasa diagnosed in NOV last year so ist really only been a few months now for us.

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  4. Just last weekend I was talking to a mom who has been trying to get an accurate diagnosis for her son and had been told a lot of disheartening things by various professionals. She had been to a new psychiatrist who was very thorough and gave him a dx of PDD-NOS.

    My immediate response was, "That's awesome!" and she smiled with relief. And then we both laughed because in what other situation would you congratulate someone on finding out your son has autism! But we both know that now he can get the help he needs.

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  5. Thanks for dropping by my blog.
    I enjoyed reading this post. I have a lot of respect for parents whose children have autism. and while most parents just say, "They are my child. Of course, I'd give this 100 %." I really place value on a mother like yourself who is doing her very best for her daughter and learning and growing. Perspective was the right post title for this one...I really appreciated all that you said, and I will embrace all my little ones imperfections.
    Blessings to you. You are doing a good job, mom! Keep it up

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  6. Hi thanks for stopping by my blog! My cousin was just diagnosed with Aspergers a few months ago. My aunt felt the same way. She feels like now that they know what's going on they can begin to cope with the challenges and help her continue to grow and learn.

    Keep up the good work!

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  7. Firstly, you've piqued my interest in the UBP - I had no idea about this!

    And I think you're right about dealing with a new reality... this is true for a lot of things and helps us cope and manage to keep moving forward with what will be most helpful for that specific situation.

    Also, Thanks for your comment on my special SITS day. I gave you a special mention in my latest post! :-)

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  8. i am praying for that boy..hugs

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  9. Thanks for stopping by my blog. I love this UBP10!
    I watch the show Parenthood on NBC. Have you seen the show? It's really great but I really like how they have a child on there that has Aspergers. It's great how the network's and screenwriters are raising awareness for Autism. It's eye opening for parents who don't have children with it and endearing for those who do.

    Keep the faith!

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  10. I'm happy that you stopped by my blog for the UBP. My daughter was just diagnosed with an autism spectrum disorder yesterday. She is also high-functioning, and we're just beginning our journey. I haven't really been able to get into it on my blog yet, but I do hope to be able to talk more at some point soon. I could definitely use an outlet for talking about some of our experiences.

    You have a new reader! Very nice to "meet" you. I'll keep your young family member and his battle in my thoughts.

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  11. Everyone, thanks for your kind posts! I really appreciate it.

    I did a couple of posts on the Parenthood show. Initially, I didn't like it much, except for the Asperger story line. Now I'm loving the whole show. It's excellent. The Asperger storyline is scarily spot-on.

    Home office mommy: it would be great to live in a world without labels--absolutely! But we needed help with teaching our daughter, and we could only get that help from professionals in the field. Without the label, you're paying out of pocket, and it's scary expensive. So, hello label!

    Rattled Mom: the beginning of the journey can be so hard! Hang in there! Do your research, and find the absolute best people who can help you out! It makes all the difference!

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  12. Thanks for sharing a bit of your story.

    I found you via the blogfrog. That's a great networking site!

    Blessings,
    Rachel

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  13. Thanks for stopping by my blog. I enjoyed reading your post on perspective. Many good thoughts and prayers for the little boy as he fights Leukemia.

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  14. Hi Cheryl, Wendy here. First time stopping by your blog. I love your writings style and this entry (Perspective) particularly touched me. So gentle and strong at the same time.

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  15. "Give your little ones a big hug and appreciate them in all their glorious imperfections!"

    ...beautiful mandate!!!

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  16. What a lovely post and I have to say that I really enjoyed reading your open and honest Q&A on SITS more than most. Hope your day rocks and that you carry on with this true and loving spirit towards your family.

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  17. I so admire and respect your positive approach. Enjoyed your SITS Q&A. Congrats on a great blog.

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  18. Getting a good diagnosis is freedom! My son and I have ADHD. We're doing great because we know how to deal with our disorder. We take our medication and enjoy life. Great that you do that too! Happy Sits day

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  19. Hello. I am visiting from SITS. I am a little late but I have been busy...sorry :(. lol Just wanted to say that, I too, have a child on the spectrum, 2 to be exact. It is always nice to find other bloggers to compare information with. I am a follower now and hope you will come read my blog too.
    http://lifewithour9.blogspot.com

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