I Ain't Afraid of No Ghosts!

I did something that I've never done before. Okay, I did many things I've never done before. The first thing is that I went on a solo vacation. No husband. No daughter. Well, I have done solo trips before, but not since I've gotten married and had a kid. I had a full week to myself where I didn't have to do anything I didn't want to.

I took a 7-day cruise that left from the Los Angeles area, where I live, and stopped at San Francisco, Santa Barbara, Catalina Island, San Diego, and Ensenada, Mexico. I've been to all these places before--many with my family. I liked that I wasn't seeing anything exotic or different without them.

Why did I pick this particular vacation? A travel agency, Banner Travel, arranged a group to go ghost hunting at 3 of the port stops. The ghost hunting excursions were included in the very reasonable price. In addition, a portion of the price went to support Relay for Life. This was amazing considering I paid way below the best price I couldn't have gotten through the cruise ship company.

In addition, Banner Travel arranged for two ghost-hunting celebrities and a psychic medium to lead us during the ghost hunts and give very interesting lectures during the cruise. The ghost-hunting celebrities were Barry Fitzgerald from Ghost Hunters International and Karl Pfeiffer, from Ghost Hunters Academy. I was lucky enough to room with psychic/medium Sarah Lemos whose readings were so amazing it was impossible to book time with her! They were a definite highlight of the trip.

This was all novel to me. While I've always had an interest in the paranormal and love watching the television ghost-hunting shows, I've never actually ghost-hunted before or spent time talking about spirit guides and dear, departed ones. I'm not sure i actually believe everything in the paranormal world. The trip definitely succeeded in opening my mind a bit. It also succeeded in making me realize I need to spend more time on my spiritual journey. I never spend time getting to know me, per se. I rush around my daily life, working and taking care of my family. The trip made me realize how much I need to nurture myself more. This doesn't mean taking lavish cruises with tv personalities, but with trying to spend a few minutes each day listening to my inner voice and getting to know it again.

I'm sure you're all wondering how the ghost-hunting went. I've never done this before, and I"m not sure it really turned out totally to be ghost hunting. The first hunt was at Alcatraz. We were lucky enough to get there in the evening, while the sun was setting. Alcatraz is a totally amazing place to visit even if it weren't haunted. It's surprisingly beautiful! It was also totally overrun with tourists, so it was impossible to really do a serious ghost hunt. However, I did have some weird experiences there. The most major one was when I was hanging out inside a solitary confinement cell with another cruiser. We heard footsteps above us, which I didn't think was all that weird at first. There was a hospital ward on the second floor that was open to tourists. I mentioned that to my friend, but after we stepped out and looked up, we could see a cell block above the solitary cells. A cell block that is restricted. No one was up there.

At Catalina Island, we received a walking ghost tour--in broad daylight. Our tour guide kept repeatedly muttering that this tour is usually done at night. Yes, you mean after our cruise ship has long departed? The beginning of the tour was at Avalon's beautiful casino building, which I've never been to! The guide kept making reference to how wonderful the tours there were, and how we should take it some day. Ahem. The tour did succeed in giving us a lot of laughs (unintentional). We also had a blast sightseeing on the island while riding around on golf carts (tip: don't let Barry drive you around on one of those. Although he did get us down the hill successfully with faulty brakes. Whew! I guess you CAN put you life in Barry's hands after all).

San Diego had the most traditional-style ghost hunts. We crammed in 3 locations, 2 of which were closed off to everyone but our group! We did these in broad daylight, but both locations, The Whaley House and The Cosmopolitan Hotel, seemed to have some activity for many in our group. I didn't experience much in these locations.

The best part about the trip was the lovely group of 24 people. Everyone was really nice, and we all got along great. I came back relaxed and refreshed.

I had a fantastic time and think I'll need to do a solo vacation every 10 years or so to indulge my interests. The next vacation will be with my family. I'm sure that will be great too.

Stupid Cleaning Lady! Part 2

Years ago, I did a post called "Stupid Cleaning Ladies!" You have to read that post to get the proper context (no, my cleaning lady is not stupid). Since then, however, whenever we have a hard time finding anything after she has cleaned the house, my husband and I will still mutter the phrase, "Stupid Cleaning Lady!"

The last couple of times she's cleaned, she has done something that we just can't figure out. She likes to take the bookmark out of the book my daughter is reading, so that she can return the book to its boxed set case.

Who purposely removes a bookmark? On multiple occasions? I know my cleaning lady is maniacal about cleaning. She leaves no stone unturned. But pulling a bookmark out of a book so that the book can be returned to its original place in the boxed set?

Yeah, I don't have much else to write about. It's been a slow week.

I Think I Last Posted in 1985.

I know. It's been way too long. I used to post 5 days a week and now I'm lucky if I post twice a month.

It's been hard keeping up with blogging while working a full-time job. This past month had been particularly crazy since we had a huge deadline at work and 12-hour days became the norm.

Now that deadline passed, I'm hoping to have some more downtime. I also did something I've never done before: I decided to take a 7-day cruise by myself and totally indulge myself by sleeping in late and having a cocktail or two. It should be fun.

I'm not going anywhere exotic--just the California coast, but I'm fine with that. I'd hate to go somewhere exotic without my family. This particular cruise is hosting a ghost hunting group, which is why I'm going on it. We're going to visit haunted sites at almost all the port stops. I've always been into the paranormal, and after having my daughter, I enjoyed watching reality paranormal shows such as Ghost Hunters and Destination Truth. The thought of ghost hunting at places such as Alcatraz sounds really exciting to me!

I bet this trip will also give me one or two fun posts. It will be nice to have something different to write about!

Have you ever taken a break from your mom-duties and taken a solo trip? What did you do?

You're a Strange Looking Kid, Charlie Brown!

My daughter loves the Peanuts comic strips! We went to a yard sale once where the hostess gave my daughter a Peanuts book dating back from the early 1960s. My daughter instantly devoured it and has loved all things Charlie Brown and Snoopy (among the rest) ever since.

In February, I taped the two Charlie Brown Valentine's Day episodes and didn't get around to showing them to my daughter until today (nothing like watching Valentine's Day shows at the end of March--don't judge me). I watched them with her. Okay, I watched most of them with her. I did doze a bit.

She absolutely adored them (no surprise). I loved them too when I was her age. But what struck me the most as I watched this was that Charlie Brown was a really weird looking kid. I couldn't get past the fact that he appeared to be a 75 year old man on the body of an 8 year old. It was really freaky.

His friend, Linus, wasn't much better. He had hair, but not much. What he did have was really stringy. He was like a 45-year old balding man desperately trying to hold on to whatever hair he had.

It made me wonder if the Peanuts kids lived by a toxic waste dump. Maybe that's what caused the adults to all speak weird? Will that be the kids' fate when they grow up?

I'm going to have nightmares tonight.

Kids Have It Pretty Damn Hard

A lot of people--particularly those that don't have kids--whine about how children are spoiled and have everything handed to them on a silver platter. In particular, Bill Maher has complained about this on Real Time. While I do agree that we cushion our kids as much as possible (such as giving trophies to all kids that participate in a sport instead of just to the winners)--this doesn't fully tell the whole story.

Kids of this generation work damn hard. Much more seems to be expected from them than from when I was a kid. My daughter's days are spent going to school, taking an enrichment class, then doing homework. Even though she's in the third grade, her homework generally takes an hour (the same amount of time as it did in first and second grade as well). She has precious little time to play.

In areas where my daughter does excel, such as reading, she's pushed to do more and more. She's highly encouraged to read way above her grade level since she's capable of it.

I have to start thinking about possible middle schools for my daughter. She can go to her neighborhood middle school, but it's not the highest rated. She qualifies for the gifted magnet middle school, but it has a reputation as being SO academic, it leaves no time for anything else. I don't know if she qualifies for the highly gifted middle school magnet, but I imagine the workload will be insane there as well. There's a good chance she could go to the neighborhood middle school that her current magnet elementary feeds into. I definitely will have to consider that one. There are other middle schools to consider, but they might not be as academically robust as she needs. Ugh!

It just seems like things were easier when I was a kid. There was no choice. You just went to your neighborhood school. Homework lasted for about 30 minutes at most. Then you'd run outside and play with the kids on your street and have a blast.

Things are so different now. I feel bad that my daughter isn't getting the childhood that I had. Everything revolves around getting her positioned to go to a good college. And she's only in the third grade.

So when I hear Bill Maher complain about how parents coddle their kids too much, I just want to tell to lay off. Kids have it pretty damn hard.

Yahoo! Decision Might Not Be a Bad One

Last week, I wrote about Marissa Mayer's decision to make Yahoo! employees work in the office instead of remotely. I felt her decision was misguided and ignored how productive people can be when they don't have to commute and can put all their energies into the work itself.

Since my post, I've seen tons of other blogs and articles that have discussed this issue. I don't think the executives at Yahoo! ever dreamed that their HR decision would strike a chord with so many people.

In my case, I felt let down that a woman in charge of a company would turn her back on more progressive work models that could help women balance work and home life. To me, it seems that with technology being what it is, there's no reason why an employer can't let workers work from home at least part of the time.

Other people seemed to feel threatened by Yahoo!'s decision. They were afraid about changes in their own workplace.

I read a couple of articles written by former Yahoo! employees who felt Marissa Mayer's decision was a good one. Apparently, Yahoo! was a bit of a mess. Not only has the company been facing problems, but there were many employees who were taking advantage of working at home. They were using the time to develop their own start-ups or just not focusing on work.

So Marissa Mayer's decision is an effort to gain control of the work being done for the company in addition to building a corporate culture. If things are such a mess there, it's actually an understandable decision. I hope that once things settle down, she'll return to a more progressive work environment as a nice perk for employees who've earned and deserve it.

Will this affect how other companies treat their employees? I'm doubtful it will start any trends. If a company is allowing employees to work from home at least occasionally and is receiving good work from the employee, I doubt the company will change its policy.

Is Marissa Mayer turning her back on women? Even though that's how I felt initially, I do understand that her first responsibility is to get her company running successfully. She does women less of a service if she publicly flops in this position.

I just have to give her make the decisions she feels is right for her company and not blow it up to mean more than it is.

Do People Who Work from Home Get Less Done?

I know I've written a lot about this subject, but I feel I need to revisit it. Again. Being a working mom is hard. It's really difficult to find the perfect life balance between satisfying your employer (or clients if you own your own business) and being there for your family. I often feel by trying to please everybody I end up pleasing nobody--least of all me. My job is demanding. The commute is even more demanding.

That's why the day I work at home each week (on average) is such a relief. It means two less hours of driving. This opens up more time to run errands, and I can often fit in more work than when I'm in the office. I'm really thankful for being to work from home occasionally. The technology means that I can get the same work done whether at home or in the office. People can reach me just as easily. It's not uncommon for coworkers to "talk" with me via Skype even if they're 100 feet away. It oftentimes doesn't matter much if I am that 100 feet away or 35 miles away. People oftentimes don't know or care.

Which is why I feel Marissa Mayer's ban on working from home so troubling. For those who don't know, Marissa Mayer is the CEO of Yahoo. She took the job on when she was 5 months pregnant. She seemed to be an amazing symbol of what women can accomplish in terms of having it all. Then she had to ruin it all with a stupid policy like this.

Her thinking, per an article that appeared in the Huffington Post, is that speed and quality go downhill when people work from home. I can personally attest that's not the case. At all. I get more done, have less interruptions, and have no difference in quality than the work I produce in the office. Ms. Mayer also believes that employees work together will build a cohesive work environment. That argument IS harder to shoot down, certainly. But I don't see how working from home occasionally would really sacrifice that.

Not everyone is destined to be a CEO. Not everyone desires to be a CEO. I believe that working moms have a lot to add to the workforce. This should be encouraged instead of discouraged. Seeing a woman openly discourage flexibility in the workplace is heartbreaking.

It's also very short-sighted.